"Well, Cassie," said the Voice of Reasonable Greed, which always sounded like John Huston, "If it is, and if you can bring back proof of a close encounter you can sell your story for enough cold, hard, cash to get you to Thailand for your sex-reassignment surgery!" Emboldened by this happy thought I proceeded steadily towards the light until, at length, I found myself directly beneath it and realized with a shock that it really was one of those triangular shaped UFOs that I had been reading about. "Whoa!" said I, and was just turning to retrace my steps when a brilliant blue light shot down from the UFO and paralyzed me. "Oh, damn," my mind said. "You're one screwed TS now!" "I've been screwed before," I reminded it. "In the words of the great Franklin Roosevelt: `We have nothing to fear but?.'" But I never finished that particular clich? because, just then, I noticed that the ground was receding beneath my feet at a slow but steady rate which seemed to me to be wholly uncalled. "I'm not sure I understand?" I said. "What part of 'overstaying' are you talking about? None of us had any choice when we were carted off. You just spent one night in a motel, after having a great meal last night. So tell me what you mean."She was perturbed. I wasn't falling into the normal pattern. I wasn't making this easy on her."At any rate," I went on after a little pause, "you should be here when the person is picked to take care of me." Oh? Why would that make any difference?"My mother was getting defensive. I hated it when she did that. I tried my best not to get sucked into that."Well, for one thing, they might want to know things that I have no idea about. Do you remember when I was at the hospital, and they asked me about allergies and if I'd had chicken pox? I had no idea."That did bring a little smile on her face."You were just five. In kindergarten. The whole class got it, one right after the next. There was only one place that I couldn't get you to not scratch. You.
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